Semi-annual 'HEY, WE'RE Back"

It's been a while since any of us have written anything. You might say that we've gotten lazy or indifferent towards keeping the handful of devoted


Here's what we have been doing over our most recent sabbattical. Rest assured it was far superior to anything you've done.

Good: Grew a beard. Shaved off afformentioned beard. Rinse, wash, repeat.
The rest is just details, becuase, honestly, when you grow a beard, everything else in life becomes second fiddle.

MMM...Beardy!



6012: After getting irritated by the lack of hostile takovers in the corporate business world, 6012 moved to Somalia to become a pirate. Armed with a small group of former wall street middle management types aching for a more exciting life, they sail the seas aboard the HMS Jonesifor. Aboard the ocean, no liquid assets are safe. The only TARP they need is a real blue tarp that they wrap around their prisoners. YO HO HO!

A standard 6012 Pirate Wench. Not too appealing on the eyes, but she still graduated atop her class at Wharton. A worthy Skally-wag!!

El Benda: Made a badass tuna-fish sandwich that was so good he hadto slap someone.

Unfortunately, that someone ended up being his landlord, and thus a messy legal dispute over intent. Read about it in the US 3rd Distirct Court Case of Bentaman v. T.UNA Feesh and the Incorport. It was a pretty heated case, ending up in hung jury. Before it could go to round 2 of arbitration, a settlement was reached.

I lost a fair share of pocket change, but I've since been able to make it up again as the face of Subway's new "TERRRIFIC TUNA SANDWICH". The ad has gone viral, and so far has a ton of hits. In a nutshell, Jared tries to eat the new subway Terrific Tuna (*NOW WITH EXTRA DOLPHIN BITS FOR FLAVOR*) sandwich.

THE AD TREATMENT

Jared sits alone at a Subway sanwich shop. I'm sitting next to him. After I get up to make some bowel movements, Jared slides into chair. Jared rubs his hands excitedly, and picks up MY sandwich. As he takes a bite I run up screaming and sucker punch him in the back of the head. He immediately gets knocked unconcious. I yell:

"MOTHERFATHER YOU BETTER NOT MESS WITH MY (turns and looks at the camera and smiles..tone slows down)...Delicious and nutricious Subway Jones Special, the Turrific Tuna sandwich. Now with extra dolphin bits for extra taste. Get it toasted! Eat it when you're Toasted!"

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But seriously, I honestly wish I did this;

So, now that we've covered those grounds, lets get back to business. Break out your Tom Jones Cds, get your fresh pot of coffee, take a piss break and then prepare for the greatest periodically updated website founded in 2009.

AND THEN EMBRACE THE NOTH.

me neith.